Before I get into this post I just want to share that I have just come into my room to find my dog has managed to get into my handbag and eat a whole pack of 5 pitta breads that I kept ready for my lunches this week. I am beyond mad. The pup better be grateful she is so cute!
I usually spend my half term holidays cuddled up in my onesie, catching up on work and my netflix watch list. However, I decided to grab the bull by the horns and start my new single lifestyle with a bang. Usually, I can’t survive more than one night out in a week but I somehow managed to have 2 big nights planned and didn’t want to miss either. I have to admit it was refreshing to find that I didn’t keep looking at the clock and counting down the hours until I could get in a taxi with a tray of cheesy chips, but actually danced the nights away (at one point, on the bar!) and enjoyed myself as I probably should have been during my student years.
On Thursday I went to a club with some old uni friends who I haven’t seen in a long time. It was sooooo good to catch up with them we spent a good portion of the night strutting our stuff without a care about what we looked like. I was never much of a dancer, tending to stick to the oh-so-safe sidestep, trying to look cute and not make eye contact with the person dancing opposite me. Apparently that has changed. I am certainly glad that there is no photographic evidence of my new dancing technique!
So, about halfway through the night it dawned on me that I am a single lady and that actually, this was a good opportunity to find out what it’s all about. I scanned the bar for anyone who looked attractive but found myself disappointed at what I saw. Now, I know that it’s not all about the looks – I promise I’m not that shallow – but I will say that I do think there needs to be a physical attraction there and I found it difficult to muster up any sort of opinion other than blahhhh about anyone I locked eyes with. Eventually, I saw a guy I liked the look of and pointed him out to my friend. Go for it! was her advice and that was the moment I froze…
How exactly do you go for it? I honestly didn’t know how to start up a conversation with this guy. I mean for one thing, it was as noisy as hell, which you would expect considering our location, and then there was the problem of what to actually say to him, on the off chance he would hear and understand me. So I stood like a lemon, catching his eye and flashing a goofy smile, dancing a little bit closer to him until eventually, another girl came along, super confident – all smiley and flirty- and with 10 mins they were at the bar together, him buying her a drink whilst she laughed at his jokes and leant on his arm. She made it look so easy.
Luckily, I didn’t have much time to ponder my disappointment because at that moment, Cyndi Lauper came on which demanded we climb up onto the nearest table to sing at the top of our voices.
So, I forgot all about men again until it came to near the end of the night and some guy beckoned me over to where he was sat. (I’d just been having a high kick competition with my friend Steven and almost flat on my arse, so maybe that is what attracted him!) We spent the next half an hour trying to have a conversation, which turned out to be very difficult thanks to the noise, amount of alcohol in my system and the fact he had a very strong Welsh accent. I don’t really remember anything that we talked about but I somehow ended up with his phone number. I’d established that he was in Manchester working and was staying in a hotel. He tried to lean in for a kiss but I dodged his advances and skipped off home, crashing in bed with a friend at 5am. Just as I was about to nod off, my phone buzzed and a text appeared from the Welsh man. What do you wanna do? Come to my hotel? I kindly refused and after some more persuading (although I’m more tempted to call it begging) on his part, he signed off and I haven’t heard from him since.
And that was my introduction to the dating system nowadays. I did have another night out, which I will discuss in another post, and my conclusion from both experiences is that nowadays it is perfectly acceptable to go out and hook up with someone in a bar. Apparently one night stands are the done thing. I’m not narrow minded enough to think that all men are only after this kind of arrangement and I am not making a statement about how chivalry is dead. In fact, I kind of like it. I think it gives women the independence to enjoy themselves and have fun without the pressure of a relationship or people judging them for being ‘easy’. I was relieved to find that nobody batted an eyelid when I kissed 2 guys in one night (again, I’ll share in the next post- this one is getting super long!) and I’m happy to find that being single is way more fun than I anticipated! Obviously, I didn’t take this particular guy up on his offer, and I am not sure that I will end up sharing a bed with someone I hardly know in the future. But then again, I never though I would find myself dancing on a bar and that happened.
And on that note – goodnight!